Toke Moments: Signs you're friends with an emotional bully

In this week’s episode of Toke Moments, Toke Makinwa takes up the topic of emotional bullying, especially from supposedly friends.

She says if you’re going to be friends with someone, make them feel like “friendship with them counts.”

According to Toke Makinwa, Emotional bullies “make friendship seem forced. (They) make the conversation seems so rehearsed. You cannot be yourself around these people” as you  worry about not setting them off.

It’s about time the issue is addressed, Toke Makinwa opines. “Friendship shouldn’t be forced and conversations shouldn’t be hard,” she says.

Toke Makinwa also identify those people that make others feel like a failure as emotional bullies because they are “so skilled at finding out everything wrong with you as a person. There is absolutely nothing you can do to make them satisfied.” According to Toke Makinwa, “even in friendship, you find yourself apologising (to them) all the time.”

Toke Makinwa notes that sometimes these people don’t even know they are like that and it could be a reflection of their own feelings of deficiencies and inadequacies.

Then there are another group of emotional bullies that Toke Makinwa says zap the energy out of everyone. Once they’re around; they drain everyone. She says you don’t need such people around.

Toke advises her viewers to surround themselves with positive people. People who see the glass as being half full, people who “cheer you on” that even when things are not going so well, will encourage you to see the positive side of things.

And if you find yourself doing one of the emotional bullying acts she identified, “stop being an emotional bully,” she urges. Imagine if other people keep doing the same to you.

Check out the vlog series below and share your thoughts about this week’s Toke Moments series: